I've got my days and nights all mixed up as well. I've been pulling all nighters like you wouldn't believe. Basically I've survived on coffee. I can't say I haven't started hearing voices though. This should get interesting.
I've also begun getting closer to my little sister (the ED one). It's really wonderful to hear her side of the story, share laughs, hang out, you know. She's doing wonderfully. She's healthy, and that's what counts. What scares me is that sometimes I feel like her stories are triggering to me. She tells me something that she used to do to be obsessive about restricting, etc, and then I think about it and try to incorporate it into my diet. Also, my best friend collapsed at work. Whether it was eating related, I have no clue. I do know that she is obsessive about not gaining weight and working out and stuff like that. It's like.... she exhibits all those symptoms and signs that we show, but then when we are together (5 days out of the week), she EATS. She makes food and stuff... I know to God she isn't puking it back up. I just don't know about her. I have my suspicions. I'm not 100% though.... I know after she collapsed, everyone at her work was asking if she had an ED. Her father cornered her when she got home and told her straight to her face that she had an ED. From personal experience, that's not how you go about getting someone help... but I just don't know.
Not like I can speak for myself, but that's not the point. I can wither away all I need to... just not everyone around me. That's not allowed. No no no no nonono.
I tried kicking my smoking habit. So far, it's going well. Definitely not smoking a pack a day anymore. I'm not making up for it in snacking, either! ;-)
On a completely unrelated note, I really think I should get a penpal. You know, to email and write to and send stuff to. I think it'd be fun. I used to have a penpal from Indonesia. He was awesome. It'd be fun to have another, so if you're a taker, lemme know. :-P
Anyway, it's about 4:30 am right now... I'm off to go watch some Lost, have one last cigarette, and wait for these prunes to do their work (or be a complete failure... a waste of 110 calories. Grr.).
Oh well.... hopefully I will return soon!
Stay sharp, loves.
xx
What are the symptoms and signs that you talk about, as in what makes you suspect she has an ED?
ReplyDeleteWell, after we graduated high school, she lost 70 pounds, and I firmly believe that was the start of it. After that, she started getting attention from boys, and she liked that. She ended up losing even more weight, and people started getting worried about her (she was getting too thin). She used to run miles upon miles a day, and obsess about whether or not she had a negative calorie intake for the day. Another friend of ours got her into modelling, and that furthered her weight loss. She ended up gaining a little bit of weight back after people started getting so worried about her.
ReplyDeleteA week ago, she was on a smoke break at work, and she fainted and had a seizure. When she came to, she had said that she hadn't eaten in a while, and the people at her work started asking her if she had an eating disorder because they needed to know what to tell the ambulance. Well, she fought them and wouldn't let the ambulance take her, and when her boss offered her soup and a dinner roll, the first thing out of her mouth was, "How many calories and sodium?" The owner of the restaurant called her dad since they are friends and expressed concern. When she finally was allowed to drive and got home, her dad cornered her about the eating disorder, and said she was getting too thin again.
After that, she came to my house, and my little sister (the one that is a recovering anorexic) and I sat her down to talk. We found out that she restricts her calories so much that almost every day, she eats so little and works out so much that her body has a negative caloric intake for the day. If she can skip a meal, she does it. She's obsessed with looking like the models in magazines, and she doesn't think she's pretty or tiny enough to keep modelling herself. She commutes to college and throws away the food her mom packs her. She keeps saying that nothing is wrong, but some of the things she says and her behaviors lead me to think otherwise. My little sister came to me and was really worried about her after she left. She told me, "Those are the same things I was worried about when I didn't eat." And now my sister is worried sick about her (not that I'm not...) because no-one wants to see this happen to someone else that is close to us.
We just don't know how to help her, or how to even bring it up... :'(
That is sad.
ReplyDeleteI understand more about the signs and so on now, thanks. I have a teenaged daughter who is very thin and her mum was bulemic, so I am trying to spot the signs.
It looks as though your friend does have a disorder though, especially if she passed out and is obsessed with the models in magazines.